I’ve had a bit of a rough half year to eight months diet-wise. I restarted low carb (many times), tried South Beach (lost weight but was miserable, depressed, and for one of the first times in my life, needing help for “transit” issues), restarted low carb again, visited America, ate a bunch of crap, got back home to the UK and that night got the phone call that my mother died. Back to America. More crap eating and trying to keep the comfort eating at bay…
It’s a wonder I didn’t balloon up to where I was before the beginning of my “weight loss journey”. If this is a journey, then let me extend that metaphor out a bit. It’s been a long ass journey, half of it I have been holding on, white knuckled. I am lost most of the time because I have a crap map written by thousands of people. I can’t rely on any inner sense of direction because I have none. Every time I pull over for directions, I get some toothless yokel with a different answer. But I am glad I started it. Grateful every day that I am at least doing something because where I was at the start of this “journey” was a hell of a lot worse than anything I’ve encountered along the way.
So anyway, there has been some backsliding (about 15 pounds at the worst), but I took some of that off, ever so slowly, when I noticed an upcoming date on my calender: my mom’s birthday.
There is no doubt in my mind that my mom’s eating habits killed her at an age that was too young. Before her death, she was old before her years due to her size, her illnesses, and her depression. I am speaking frankly about something I would have never had the nerve to say when she was alive, and for that I am sorry.
And she has passed on her eating to me. Not through genes as we were not blood related (she adopted me when I was two). If anything, I took on her habits with even more skill than she did, but I will be damned if I will let the same tragedy of a short, miserable life happen to me. And I think that there is no better homage I can pay to her than to break out of this cycle.
Exactly a month ago today, I could have recommitted to low carb. I think that most low carb eating plans are very good, healthy provided they are planned right, and promote long term weight loss and general well-being. However, I cannot eat a diet that includes any animal products that I can’t be assured were produced ethically with minimal suffering to the livestock. Because of this, our grocery bill at times could be quite high. And even then with the reassurances, I sort of never felt all that comfortable eating meat.
So, instead, I drew up a set of rules and guidelines to follow which allows me to eat a moderately carb conscious diet but focuses mainly on organic vegetables and some fruit. It’s not a vegetarian diet as we eat sustainable fish and seafood on occasion, but we’ve cut all sugar, refined carbohydrate, and have limited our portions of starch heavy foods. I cut out most artificial sweetener, and my husband has traded his sweets and crisps for fruits and nuts. We’ve started ordering food from an organic produce company, and eat most of our food from the boxes.
My husband, of course, has lost about twice as much weight as I have, but in this month, I’ve managed to drop 8.5 pounds. I am almost at the weight I was before I visited the States.
I am hoping that this blog will help someone out there who is struggling. Or is looking for someone to shout “ROAD TRIP!” when they hear about “weight loss journeys”. Or someone who is willing to give me a pat on the back when I need one. I will try to update it more than I have, including recipes, progress reports, and lame jokes. I am looking forward to it.